>> GAMES > GAMING CULTURE

You Game What You Snack...

Everyone knows that ages old cliché; you are what you eat... If that were true, then your friendly neighborhood Geek is a big ‘ol juicy taco with spicy... Um... That is a little unsettling, let us move on from said image… Anyway, I think that cliché is pretty much bunk, unless we are talking about gamers. Any gamer, any game. See, there have been many attempts at labeling gamers by their dice tossing (or mouse fragging) playing style. Also, by their vast and frightening knowledge of a rulebook’s exact contents (the digital equivalent being gamers who re-write game codes). However, to my knowledge, no one has attempted to understand gamers through their food and drink consumption. Well, no one until today!!!

Lets start off with something simple...

The Neo-Hippie - These are some of the rarest of gamers, primarily because the majority of them are women and as we all know, there just isn’t too many ladies tossing the dice. To be fair, that trend is changing as more and more game stores are holding "game training" sessions and attempting to lessen the stigma of gaming being a boys only club. (I also think the rise of online RPGs is helping to bring girl gamers to the table). Now, you can tell the Neo-Hippie because they tend to drink tea at the table. Not just any tea, mind you. Oh no, the Neo-Hippie brings her (or his) tea in a loose-leaf form, often within an un-bleached cotton bag. They place their loose tea into a wooden and/or hemp satchel bag and allow it to steep while acting out the actions of their "well-balanced" Druid. (The only character they ever play... With the exception of some male Neo-Hippies that play an introspective Barbarian). Avoiding the plethora of chips and Red Vines at a gaming table, the Neo-Hippie only gnaws on dried fruits and organic jerky. Assuming they eat meat at all...

Edition Snob - This person has been gaming for a long time. Although not as annoying as the dreaded Rules Lawyer or Munchkin, the Edition Snob can still get tiring at a gaming table. The Edition Snob is the person who still pines for the days of "XX Edition". Generally, the Edition Snob is absolutely certain that any previous edition of a game is better than the one the group is playing now. You can tell a Snob a mile away by their choice of snack foods... The Edition Snob finds themselves above the consumption of normal chips and basic cola. Oh no. The Edition Snob brings a bag of imported Jalapeno / Irish Cheddar Krisps and a glass bottle of Sal Pellegrino. Now, there are times when the Edition Snob is low on funds and will "settle" for Gardetto's and Dr. Pepper... As long as the Edition Snob can appear "advanced", he or she will feel better about himself or herself. It should also be noted that Edition Snobs, 80% of the time, are the DM... Look, I can smell my own!

The Juicer - Oh doctor. The Juicer needs everything and needs it now. The Juicer often uses a computer to generate their character and couldn’t give a tinkers cuss for character development or story progression. The Juicer is there to kick some Orc ass and drink mass amounts of caffeine. Now, I’m not talking about the normal input of caffeine that is consumed at the gaming table. No. The Juicer pumps caffeine into their body at an exponential rate. They arrive at the gaming table with a pack of Red Bull (Although modern Portland area Juicers should switch to this Geek’s personal favorite gaming beverage, Viso). The Juicer's choice of food is a couple tubes of Pringles. The logic being, they can simply shove the tube into their gullet, easier to avoid all that pesky chewing which just gets in the way of more caffeine. The Juicer spends their shaky nights dreaming of ways to create caffeinated chips. The Juicer, while entertaining, can wear a gaming group's patience when they run out of said vice. They just start to sit there and quiver... Although, it can be fun to mess with them and not allow for a 7-11 break until the party escapes from the Pit of Despair. Strangely, the Juicer often shuns coffee... Couldn't tell you why.

Now, there are dozens of other gamer types out there... However, at the risk of angering even more friends, I will bring this rant to an end...

However... Pop on over to the GitC Forums and tell me your gamer type...