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Spider-Man 3 – Spoiler Free Review

Ok where to begin with the review of Spider-Man 3*? Did I like it? Yeah sure, it was ok. Was it as good as Spider-Man 2? Hell no! Will the fan boys dig it? Well, that depends so let’s start there.

I have reviewed all three Spider-Man films, and each time I have stated that I am not a comic book guy; ergo I don’t know much of the back-story about Spidey and the villains that wish to see him go away. I know all about the radioactive spider bite, but that is about as far as my knowledge of the comic series goes. My Spider-Man knowledge comes from what Sam Raimi has taught me over the last six years.

I am ok with that; films based on comic books are just as much for the uninitiated as they are the fans. Some fail miserably while others succeed, and in the recent run of films based on comic books, the Spider-Man films work, very well. The toughest critics of the Spider-Man films (as with any other adored comic series) will always going to be the fans.

The following is not so much of a critical review of Spider-Man 3, but more from a fan perspective of the last two films, which I loved. (I personally believe Spider-Man 2 is one of the best superhero films ever made). I know that I am not alone in that summation. As such, it goes without saying that Spider-Man 3 has a massive web to fill...

Spider-Man 3 is just too damn busy; there I have said it and it is out there. Done and done. Not only does the film introduce three new major characters, but needs to deal with open plot lines from the last two features.

The new guys: First, Flint Marko (badass name by the way) enters the scene. Thomas Hayden Church fantastically portrays Marko. (Who has come a long way since his TV sitcom days as Lowell on that god awful Wings). Marko is a man who seems to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and winds up in jail for crimes he committed to help save his sick daughter. Marko is a good guy who made bad decisions. Running from the police after a jailbreak, Marko falls into a science experiment that mixes his molecules with sand and he becomes a shape shifter. The Sandman is born. The police inform Peter Parker (Toby Maguire once again) about the connection of Marko and the shooting death of his Uncle Ben.

Then there is the bizarro Peter Parker, if you will; Eddie Brock, played smarmily by Topher Grace. (He seems to play this type of roll very well). Brock is also a budding photographer and has his eyes on Parker’s freelance gig with the Daily Bugle. Events unfold and Brock becomes Venom, the evil Spider-Man who seems to have the same powers, if not more so, as the web slinger himself. As if that wasn’t enough... What cast of new characters would be complete with out a new possible love interest? Enter Gwen Stacy (Bryce Dallas Howard) to make Parker’s life more complicated. Stacy is a classmate of Parker as well as the newest damsel in distress saved by Spider-Man.

Ok, now that we have the newbies laid out for you, let’s talk about the story a bit... Well crap, no let's not. I always try to avoid spoilers and I am not about to break that rule this time.

I will say this. A new plot line introduces an alien species in the form of a black glob that seems very attracted to Peter and takes him over by changing him to an arrogant ass. It also alters the Spidey suit into a kick-ass shade of black and grey. Finally, um... uh... there is a dance number. I thought I could finish this review with out mentioning the song and dance number, but come on! A rebellious Peter Parker busts out in dance and struts around the streets Tony Manero style? He also demands cookies... I'm serious, the new tough guy Peter Parker DEMANDS COOKIES...that is about as badass as he gets. Well at least the dark Spider-Man has some badass moments.

Oh, I almost forgot to mention the continuing saga of Parker's best friend Harry Osbourne, son of the long deceased Norman Osbourne, aka the Green Goblin. Harry is convinced that Spider-Man killed his father, The Green Goblin, and continues his quest for revenge against Spider-Man as the New Goblin. (I was assuming it would be the Hobgoblin, but I suppose not).

So you got all that? There is just too much going on in Spider-Man 3. In addition to all the plot points listed above, we get the continuing Mary Jane/Peter Parker arch. Will they or won’t they get married? Can they both struggle with Peter’s own personal demons as Spider-Man?

Now I must say that Spider-Man 3 still has the same look and feel that the last two had, which is a very good thing. Sam Raimi continues to add that "Raimi" touch to the series. He has an uncanny ability to make the audience feel a part of the action, without the obvious winks to the camera, etc... I am a part of Peter Parker's world. When Spider-Man is swinging between the buildings on New York City, I am right there with him. When Spider-Man (or any character) feels pain, Raimi makes sure that you feel the pain right along with them. I must give credit to the success of all the Spider-Man films to Raimi. In fact, there probably would not be a part 3 without Raimi... Actually, let me rephrase that, I would not have seen any of the Spider-Man films if Raimi did not make them.

It is very hard to blame Raimi for the mess that is Spider-Man 3. It pains me to call it a mess, but on the surface, that is exactly what is. There was too much pressure to tie up the loose ends from the previous two films. There was too much pressure to have Venom in the film. The audience receives far too little screen time with Venom, primarily because we only get 15-20 minutes of Eddie Brock in the suit. That is just not right; again, we have too much going on. Raimi (who co-wrote the script with his brother Ivan) originally wanted a story centered on Sandman, his personal favorite Spidey bad guy.

Unfortunately, fan and studio pressure demanded Venom in this film, so we do get our beaks wetted, only to find out that our beaks become wet with sour milk.

Don't get me wrong Venom is all kinds of badass, he really is. He is scary as hell and just lays the beat down on our boy. But come on now, give the fans what we want, a Spider-Man movie with Venom as the only villain. I wish I could reference some story line from the books, but alas, that is just not going to happen, because I don’t know any. I do know that Venom is a fantastic villain and Sony/Columbia studios simply robbed the fans of their moment. The studio lacked any respect for Venom in Spider-Man 3.

For all of the issues, Spider-Man 3 has all the makings of another great chapter in the web slinger's story. Sadly, Spider-Man 3 never fully delivers on its promise to the audience. Notice I said "fully", it has some great moments of action and is a lot of fun. However, once the onion begins to peel, things just fall apart and that is really a shame.

I have to give Spider-Man 3 3 out of 5 Critical Hits (actually I would give it 2 out of 5, but giving a Sam Raimi film anything less then at least 3 is just not right).

*Editors Note - It still bums me out that Raimi didn't get his wish in the titles... The title, in a perfect world, would have been The Spectacular Spider-Man. (With the first simply being Spider-Man and the second being The Amazing Spider-Man) - AD