>> RANTS > FROM THE PEN OF THE MASTER GEEK

...But, the Pinheads Will...

It is not very often that I get to write a follow-up article. Like most Geeks, I have a wickedly short attention span. However, some recent headlines and articles in various papers throughout this fine land have moved me to write a companion piece to You Won't Ruin My Childhood. My personal beliefs on the matter have not changed one iota; Disney will not and cannot ruin my childhood.

But, the asshat political groups sure as hell can!

Let me restate that. The asshat political groups can't ruin my childhood anymore. However, the asshat political groups will ruin the current crop of wee Geek childhoods. You'll notice that I don't mention one side of the political agenda landscape over the other. That would be because they both make as much sense as Midichlorians and anyone who follows them blindly are as thick as the idiot who wrote the Bea Arthur sing-along with Jefferson Starship. I understand that people want to try to politicize darn near everything these days, but it seems that when it comes to witches, wizards, and talking lions the two sides kick into asshat overdrive. (Yes, asshat is my new favorite word, deal).

Every few years when JK Rowling releases a new Harry Potter novel the far religious right gets into a tiff that the books are nothing but a sugary slip’n’slide to the bowels of El Diablo. The same thing happens every time a Potter movie hits the multiplexes of the world. Overly concerned and terribly misguided parents seek the true hidden meanings behind the young wizards fantastical adventures. Forgetting that, just like devil music, the message is the same: Send us you money. Inevitably, the battle lines are drawn across our supposed two-color country and the book burning and name-calling begins. The right claims they are merely trying to protect the children and their ever naive souls and the left claim the books are simply fun escape for kids to read and enjoy. The talking point banter of asshat versus asshat usually goes on for a week or so... Some bleeding heart buys a few cases of Potter books for a middle school while a wacko preacher burns Potter books in Rusty Nail, Utah... Then, as is the case with all modern media tales, we turn the page to the next sensational story to capture out fancy.

Except this time, the page is written by CS Lewis.

I adore the Chronicles or Narnia. I can say without hesitation that those seven books in every measurable way helped make me the Geek I am today. They were the first fantasy books I ever read. To me, there would be no Middle Earth, no Westeros, no Camelot, possibly even no galaxy far, far away without Narnia. CS Lewis entered my life in a time in which I was literally bed ridden and had no escape from the drab medicated world I had to live in. I did not understand or even care to understand the religious themes so prevalent within CS Lewis’ writing. To me, those books were simply a fantastic escape filled with danger, excitement, heroism, and epic mythical deeds. In time, I learned that CS Lewis was trying to express his love of his faith in those books, but I never once thought he wanted the message to get in the way of the story. It is insulting that certain factions within the right are claiming that the Chronicles of Narnia are theirs, and those who do not share their beliefs and outlooks cannot enjoy the stories. (Unless they are, of course, will to be converted in the process). However, it is also insulting that the left; who just a few months prior were telling rapid Potter haters to let their kids simply enjoy the fantastical tales are now claiming that Hollywood is bending to religious pressure by bringing The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe to the big screen. Some even going so far as to...wait for it...boycott a movie they feel is too ingrained with Christian messages and images. Well, at least all they have to do is swap out a few names and they can use the same lame press releases and statements used by the right.

Both sides need to just go away.

First off, I love the fact that the theme of good versus evil must be, in some fashion, a Judeo-Christian belief only and everyone else in the world is fine with pain and suffering. Idiots.

Secondly, do you people realize that you are taking all the joy out of being a child? Both sides love to talk about the good old days when life seemed simpler and people smiled a little easier. Well, congratulations, you are one of the reasons kids today do not seem to get as much enjoyment from flights of fancy and the power of imagination. Hell, if I were forced to break down and try to understand the deeper meaning or symbolism behind a book at the age of eight, I wouldn't want to read anymore either. Just by me an XBox and leave me alone. The world is hard enough as it is to then have some fire and brimstone asshat telling some kid that he or she is delving in Satanism for daring to pick up the newest Harry Potter book. Stop forcing a child to listen to a sermon on the true meaning of Aslan the Lion when all they really want to do is pick up a copy of Prince Caspian and continue their adventure. Please, just let your kids be kids. Sure, you know the symbolism is there but that is because you were allowed to discover it on your own. You read the books, you imagined you were those characters and you did it all without being told by some talking head that what you were doing was right or wrong. Anyone who claims they understood the deeper meaning behind The Chronicles of Narnia or any other theme laden fantasy (or other) series the first time they read as a child are simply attempting to make themselves look smart now. You discovered the deeper meaning the same way everyone else did, the same way I did.

You came back to the stories that spoke to you.

There is a reason why we love and identify with these stories so well. They all follow the same mythical arch that is ingrained within our very soul. We love and need the hero journey. Each one of us sees a small bit of themselves within the heroes of these stories. As we grew in age, so do did our understanding of these tales. We saw the deeper meaning in them. They made us want to tell stories of our own, either literally or by simply striving to be the best with our own gifts. Why the hell can't we do that with the younger generation? Why do we feel the need to tell them this book is evil, but this book it good? One movie does not spread the message of Christ anymore then another opens the door to Hades. They are not marketing ploys. They are not tools for swaying one belief over another.

Give kids a little more credit. Let the kids discover the message and meaning on their own. Trust me, they will. Think back and remember how powerful that initial opening was when you had discovered the meaning behind a certain myth or tale. Try to remember what Star Wars or Lord of the Rings, and even The Chronicles of Narnia meant to you once you followed and understood your own hero journey. Think back to all the mentors and guides who helped you along the way. They did not force it down your throat when you wanted nothing more but adventure. Why not let todays young readers and viewers do the same.

Myths are just that, myths. Stories to widen the eyes of the young and open the minds of the old.

Let them.

Leave the politics to the grumps...